Wedding Dreams and expectations

Remember when you woke up on your wedding day and your wedding dress didn’t fit, none of your guests showed up and your caterer brought in pizza instead of the five-course dinner you’ve been obsessing over for months? Don’t worry—none of this will happen in real life, but ever since you started wedding planning, nightmare scenarios like these have likely popped up in your dreams.

Everyday stress coupled with wedding stress can have quite an affect on your subconscious, making “bridemares” an actual thing—so I asked Lauri Quinn Loewenberg, certified dream analyst, author of Dream on It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life and founder of the website What Your Dream Means about dreams that real brides have had, and what it says about their wedding stress. Read through them and see if you’ve been having any similar nightmares. And just remember: It may rain on your wedding day, but you definitely won’t go down the aisle naked!

I dreamed I was running late to the ceremony. As soon as I arrived, I started going down the aisle, but it never ended and I couldn’t find my fiancé or the bridal party. Then another wedding started and the other bride started walking down the aisle too. I had missed my own wedding!

“Running late is a common theme in dreams, especially when you’re a bride-to-be. These running late dreams are most often caused by deadlines in real life—and you certainly have one and it’s fast approaching. You’re probably worried about your invitations arriving in time, having all the guest seating figured out and so on, and the clock is ticking. But I also wonder if you feel getting engaged or even setting the date was a long time coming. If so, elements of that are at play here. But notice how walking down the aisle never ended—you must be feeling like all the preparations are never-ending. The other bride and the other wedding may very well represent all the other weddings and brides you compare yourself to or get inspiration from. During this stressful wedding prep time, it’s important to remember to enjoy every step, even the missteps, because it’ll come and go before you know it—like you missed your own wedding!”

I dreamed I showed up on our wedding day and didn’t have my dress, and I was running around trying to find a dress while all our guests were there!

“The dress is the single most important thing to a bride, so it’ll be the star of many of her bridemares leading up to the wedding day. What’s the status of your dress right now? Do you have one picked out? Are you waiting on alterations? If your dress isn’t yet secure and ready to go, then this dream is an expression of your frustration or anxiety over the dress being absolutely 100 percent perfect. But if your dress is picked out, purchased and ready, there must be something else that isn’t yet in place that your subconscious is worried about. Ask yourself what else in your life feels the same as not having your dress on your wedding day. What are you feeling ill-equipped to handle? What is of vital importance to you in your life right now but seems to be missing?”

I dreamed I sent out my invitations with the wrong date on them, didn’t realize it, and no one showed up to my wedding.

“Brides want to shine at their wedding, but they also want their guests to have a memorable time. This dream might reflect your concern with how to best accommodate your guests. But—like most dreams—it may go deeper than that. The incorrect date is the blunder in this dream. In real life, was there an issue with settling on the right the date of your wedding? If so, is there still concern? Or is there a part of you that feels the engagement went too quickly or took too long? Also, guests not showing up to the wedding is a common bridemare and can sometimes reflect that the bride feels there’s someone in her life that’s not being as supportive as she’d like. If that’s the case with you, your dream is bringing it to your attention so you can address it in real life and hopefully settle it before your wedding day.”

I dreamed on several occasions that both my wedding dress and my matron of honor’s dresses went MIA and our only apparel option ended up being sequin blazers.

“To be honest, I think sequin blazers would rock! But I understand you wishing to take the more traditional route. Since your matron of honor and you are in the same predicament in this dream, ask yourself what predicament you both recently shared in real life. It may not even have to do with the wedding at all. Since the dream focused on clothing, it may have to do with an issue where you had concern over how the way you handled it appeared to others. Whatever it was, your dream seems to be showing that you both managed to come out of it shining! Sounds to me like you chose the perfect matron of honor.”

I dreamed my hair and makeup weren’t ready in time, so I had to walk down the aisle with wet hair.

“Time pressure is very prevalent in most bridemares, and this is because so much has to be done—and done right—in time for the wedding day. But the specifics in these dreams will point to specific issues in real life. Your hair and makeup could simply reflect all the loose ends you need to tie up in regards to the wedding, but also ask yourself if there’s any other unfinished business you need to take care of with family or friends before your wedding day. Dreams often use word play. Is there anyone you need to ‘make up’ with? Hair in dreams often symbolises what’s on our mind in real life at the time of the dream. Your hair was wet, so this may mean you need to get your thoughts in order so you can make up. Your dream might be warning you that walking down the aisle with unfinished business on your mind isn’t a good look.”

I dreamed the wedding day came and I slept in until the afternoon and called everyone to remind them that it was my wedding day and only some of my vendors showed up.

“Sleeping in a dream is often connected to sleeping through an issue in real life—needing to wake up and smell the coffee, so to speak. Is there anything—either in regards to your wedding or otherwise—that you need to stop turning a blind eye toward? Since you woke up in the dream, it could mean you did have that needed “awakening” or realisation in real life. The fact that only some of your vendors showed up in the dream makes me wonder if part of you feels you need to downsize in real life. Perhaps that’s the awakening you had: It’s easy to go overboard with wedding planning, and sometimes, less is more.”

I dreamed my parents couldn’t make it because they were stuck in an airport for almost two weeks.

“I’ve found, in my research, that whenever a specific amount of time or a specific amount of anything is in a dream, it can be connected to that same amount of something in real life. You have the specific amount of two weeks, so ask yourself, at the time of this dream, what had been going on for two weeks? Or was something supposed to happen in two weeks? You may need to put on your thinking cap. You also have the common dream theme of being stuck. That happens when something in our waking life has ceased to progress. Did anything between you and your parents stall? Were you having a disagreement and did you come to an impasse? What else would you say was stuck in your life at the time? The airport is a clue that this may have to do with something you had ‘high’ hopes for, something that could really take off, so to speak. I think your dream is showing you that some sort of decision needs to be made (indecision causes stagnation) or something needs to be done to get the progress going again so you can walk down the aisle with peace of mind.”

I dreamed multiple times that I didn’t have my vows written for the ceremony.

“We’ll get the same dream again and again when we’re dealing with an unresolved issue—so for as long as the issue continues, so will the dream. Let’s start with the obvious: Were you struggling with writing your vows at the time of these dreams? If so, this is simply your subconscious nagging you about what you need to do. If that’s not the case, there may have been some other promise or commitment you were struggling with. Look at any promises or commitments you may have made to yourself first. For example, did you commit to losing weight before your wedding day and was that a struggle for you? Or did you make a promise to someone else and are having a hard time following through? Your dream is a good example of how the dreaming mind does not like complacency and will be happy to nag us to death until we take action or follow through.”